Thursday, July 31, 2008

A New Way Of Thinking For Me

Today I read Donna’s yesterday’s post, about her nephew Jazz, who’s life was ended by way of a stabbing, I was deeply saddened. It was two years July 1st, and yesterday would have been his 23rd birthday. Please pay her a visit of encouragement, it is so much needed by her and her family. Donna's Story

I got to thinking about my own situation. I can relate to her loss because, I loss one of my daughter’s by way of a drunk driver. She was only 20 years old at the time. I can think to myself that she had a full life ahead of her and I could become deeply saddened wondering what the rest of her life could have been, but I really can't, because that’s not what I believe. I’m now changing my words from lost my daughter to a drunk driver, to lost my daughter by way of a drunk driver, because what I actually believe is that time of departure belongs to the Lord. He has a time already planned for each and everyone of us to leave this earth. He says in his word,

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heavens A time to be born and a time to die Ecclesiastes 3:1-2a

My Pastor always says the Lord wrote the play, and we’re just acting out the parts in the play. It was my daughter's time because if not, the Lord would have intervened, which He is able to do, but He had a reason, not known to me, not know to you, but all still a part of His perfect plan.
Sure the people that caused the incident should be held accountable for their actions which was indeed a wrong doing on their part, and everyone knows right from wrong.

I find comfort believing that the Lord used my daughter’s timing, to help a host of people, people on my end, people on the end of the wrong doer. Because we all suffered the pain. I know for sure that it helped me because my life was changed, it prompted me to give my life to Christ, ( you can read my testimony in my June 3, 2008 post). I’m truly thankful to for that.

There's a great comfort for me when I look at these times of departure as (by way of), and not because of. I also believe to get through the pain, we just have to lean on the Lord at all times, his grace is sufficient and I have complete faith that the Lord’s plan is perfect. . Deb

12 comments:

KKJD1 said...

Deb, you are completely right. I cannot imagine what a loss like that must be like, and hope i never have to ,but in saying that if I ever do I sure hope and pray I will think the way you do. You are a blessing. I think God allows things like that to happen so we can help others in a time of loss as we have been thru. You really never know what to say unles you have been thru the same thing. Thanks for giving me a new insight on how to look at losses. Love ya, Karen

nanatrish said...

Deb, this was a very thoughtful sweet post. You have encouraged me. God is so good and He said He will never leave us nor forsake us. He is there with your friend and with you. He has sent the Holy Spirit to comfort us and He gives us a peace beyond understanding. I pray that you and your friend will keep trusting the Lord and know that there are people out here praying for you.

Connie said...

The Lord's way is perfect, sweetpea. I recently heard something that I didn't know or realize before. When we die and are reunited with our families and loved ones and we've lost a child, that child will be the same age in which it died and we can raise it from that age. I think of all the parents that lost a small child before its time and that must give such comfort to them! I believe this with all my heart. Now, isn't that something to look forward to? Your sweet 20 yr old daughter will not have changed one whit! You'll see her as she actually was when she departed for heave. Oh, how glorious that will be for you. She's still alive in spirit doing good on the other side.

Yes, I'm serious tonight and that's different from my usually humorous style, but some things are just SERIOUS!!

Smoochies and love,
Connie

Jan Parrish said...

Deb, just sharing your pain and acceptance is encouraging to so many.Thanks for being so transparent.

Terrie's Lil' Piece of Serenity said...

Deb, I have missed you so much. You are such a dear friend. I admire your strength. I know it's god given. We do have an amazing god!! Hugs, Terrie

Mrs. B said...

Oh Deb, your positive outlook and faith should be inspiration to us all. As I've said before, I can't imagine the pain that you must have gone through. Your ability to rise from that tragedy and make your life better is just so touching.
Hugs, Mrs. B

Donna said...

Deb,
I can not thank you enough for this post. July, 1st and July 3oth are two reminders of how much I miss my nephew. The murder was indeed sensless... that goes with out saying. I cant help but to think of the life that he had ahead of him. (It's what we parents, aunt's and uncle's look forward to.) When I think of what his future would or could have been, I smile. I dont cry, I dont place blame on anyone. I have more good days than bad. July, 1st is a harsh reminder for me. July, 30th is a day of celebration.. without him. Considering that feelings are a natural emotion... I go with the flow.. I honor my feelings and I feel blessed that I am able to share them with you and the rest of my blog friends.

From the moment that my nephew passed, I knew not to question God in his infinate wisdom. I knew it was his time to go. That does not mean that I dont miss him and that I wont hurt. Honestly speaking.. I have asked why, knowing that perhaps, I should not. (That's what we all do when we do not understand something.) It does not mean that we do not trust, sometimes we get lost in our pain and sorrow.. and trust me.. I know who to call on to find my way back... (Almighty God)

I am very sorry for your loss. I am very happy that you have found comfort and a new way of thinking. God is able... we just need to be willing. I have always been willing and God has always come through for me. I trust that God knows best. I also trust my feelings, and I honor them. Had I not.. I would have never posted my Story, you would have never written this one... just look at how many people you have encouraged thus far! (including myself.)

Hugs,
Donna

PAT said...

Deb, thank you so much for this beautiful post. Your faith is wonderful and the words you wrote, not only eloquent, but elegant also. You are an amazing woman. I am so blessed to have found you, dear friend.

Pat

Rue said...

That is a much better way of thinking and I tend to believe that myself. Time is borrowed here on earth and we need to appreciate today, because who knows what tomorrow holds for us.

hugs,
rue

Pearl said...

Ohh Deb... Your deep faith in our Lord is such a beautiful testimony to so many and I love your "new" way of thinking! Your spirit is so strong ~hugs~

Thanks for coming to the party and do not worry about not having time to "get dressed"... did you see the size of that Pink Limo I have?! Just crawl up to the middle where the private dressing rooms are... heheheee! I sure do hope that your UnBirthday is an awesome one, Sweetie... God bless...

~hugggs~
Pearl

Connie said...

"Ask the Mexican guy?!?!?!" Oooohmygosh, chickee, you are tooooo funny!! But it was not pretty, I tell ya!! Plus I think the guy is still in the psych ward trying to forget the whole incident!!!!!!

I'm definitely getting some mirrors for the house now though. I'm not too much into mirrors - they've been showin' th' wrinkles, sweetpea!! That ain't purdy either, my lovely friend........ *Sigh*.........

Smoochies,
Connie

Lea of Farmhouse Blessings said...

How very brave of you, Deb! You are amazing and inspiring.

Blessings,
Lea